Weblog's new background imagery source 'AWOL'
Sources close to weblogger 'PIK' have revealed that plans for a background image 'laced with wit and artistic merit and not a little irony' have fallen foul of 'obsessive and intrusive' housekeeping from 'the strange old lady on the third floor'.
Bitterly disappointed
'Three months of planning have come to nothing' said PIK in an oft candid, sometimes emotional statement.
"I had collected a remarkable amount of phone sex fliers in my mailbox, some of which had kindly been donated by friends - it was a cooperative effort...Obviously, to now find them missing... Leaves me bitterly disappointed'.
An empty mailbox, yesterday
PIK, real name PIK, had intended to create a collage with the fliers which would have been imbued with, what he terms '...A sympathetic feminist angle' apparently emanating from '...The humour arising from the selective juxtapositioning of tens of images of naked or partially undressed women, some of whom are arranged in desperately un-erotic bodily contortions. If we are laughing, we are undermining, yes?'said PIK, apparently unsure.
This would have then been digitally scanned using newfangled technology, and incorporated into the website.
Bloody intrusive
Immediately after a brief excursion 'for a few days', PIK arrived home to find his collection 'missing'. It appeared that his mailbox had been 'cleaned' by the 'strange, but always cordial' old woman from the third floor.
'She seems to have appointed herself my moral guardian', said PIK, 'it's bloody intrusive, is what it is'.
Appropos of nothing
'When I go bowling, I favour a size 12 ball' said PIK, appropos of nothing.
Another subheading
'When I found the mailbox devoid of pornographic advertising, my stomach turned'
'What gets me is that when I see [the strange old woman from the third floor], she's always ready with a nice 'Konbanwa' even as I watch her go down and intrude upon my box...I'd like to take this matter further, but how?'
'Stomach turned', yesterday
Bitterly disappointed
'Three months of planning have come to nothing' said PIK in an oft candid, sometimes emotional statement.
"I had collected a remarkable amount of phone sex fliers in my mailbox, some of which had kindly been donated by friends - it was a cooperative effort...Obviously, to now find them missing... Leaves me bitterly disappointed'.
An empty mailbox, yesterdayPIK, real name PIK, had intended to create a collage with the fliers which would have been imbued with, what he terms '...A sympathetic feminist angle' apparently emanating from '...The humour arising from the selective juxtapositioning of tens of images of naked or partially undressed women, some of whom are arranged in desperately un-erotic bodily contortions. If we are laughing, we are undermining, yes?'said PIK, apparently unsure.
This would have then been digitally scanned using newfangled technology, and incorporated into the website.
Bloody intrusive
Immediately after a brief excursion 'for a few days', PIK arrived home to find his collection 'missing'. It appeared that his mailbox had been 'cleaned' by the 'strange, but always cordial' old woman from the third floor.
'She seems to have appointed herself my moral guardian', said PIK, 'it's bloody intrusive, is what it is'.
Appropos of nothing
'When I go bowling, I favour a size 12 ball' said PIK, appropos of nothing.
Another subheading
'When I found the mailbox devoid of pornographic advertising, my stomach turned'
'What gets me is that when I see [the strange old woman from the third floor], she's always ready with a nice 'Konbanwa' even as I watch her go down and intrude upon my box...I'd like to take this matter further, but how?'
'Stomach turned', yesterday
posted by pik at 21:22
3 Comments:
Ah, these images are far more satisfactory and keeping with the Pik of old. For his real name was Pik also.
I'm disgusted at the rape of your mailbox by this moral guardian. If I had my way she would have her thighs injected with heroin and gin until they became bloated with their guilt. I shall make it my mission to check out the piss stained public telephone boxes of Manchester to see if I can find any suitable replacements - if I do I shall scan them and forward them to you forthwith. My personal favourite is "Dirty Gerty" of Bootle, Liverpool. She look's like a keeper... Until next time.
Al,
I am with you until the suggestion of forced intravenal druggery. A novel, yet particularly harsh, comeuppance.
Shame on you.
Now this, I like. Long live the new old Pik!
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